My Haunted House

After two years, I had suspected it, but now I've come to see
That my house is haunted by two friendly ghosts: I Don't Know and Not Me.
I've never really seen them, and they seldom make a sound.
They're more mischievous than anything, but they really hang around.
They leave crumbs on the kitchen counter, and trash beside the sink.
They never remember to shut the door, and draw on jeans with ink.
They eat chocolate from my candy dish, but leave the wrappers there.
Sometimes they make the bathroom such a mess, I really want to swear!
I thought at first it was the hubby, or maybe just the kids,
Who left those clothes upon the floor or misplaced my Tupperware lids.
But when I ask them who the culprit is, they smile angelically.
Their answer is always "I don't know" and sometimes just "Not Me".
I Don't Know gets in the trouble most, for he's the messiest one.
Not Me is a bit more sneaky, but still likes to have his fun.
It's hard enough to keep this place neat without their extra assistance.
These darn ghosts have made it so much worse, and provide too much resistance.
I'm off to vacuum once again and clean up all this crap.
For some reason, while my kids are in school, my two ghost like to nap.